Please try to understand us not choke us

I haven't updated my blog for a few weeks. Ma Maitresse has been busy writing her book. But she said I could borrow ze computer today to write with because I saw something on Twitter this morning which upset me very much.

It was re-posted by my friend @widgetty who is a very nice human bean who understands us animals, but it was about something very bad, so I couldn't stay quiet.

It's about someone who is selling collars which are designed to cut off a dog's air supply to stop them from being "dominant" and aggressive. You can read all about them for yourself here http://leerburg.com/746.htm

Now I am a dog who can be very aggressive, to people and dogs I don't know. And I can tell you quite simply why I am, and why almost every other dog which is called aggressive,is like that. I'm quite simply terrified.

Never mind any of this dominance nonsense. I don't want to be dominant, I want to be small and invisible so no-one notices me and leaves me alone. But when people come near me, I do the only thing I know to make them go away - I bark and growl and snarl. And it works, they usually go away. I don't chase after them and attack them because they've done what I wanted them to do - left me alone.

Now ma maitresse understands my fear and tries to help me. Sometimes she gets things wrong because she is only a human bean and she gets frustrated and even shouts at me. But I know she would never, ever deliberately do anything to cause me any pain or damage.

These collars, it says, are specifically designed to show the dog who is boss by cutting off its air supply. I'm only a leetle French dog, but I can't understand how that is even legal. It is so very dangerous, because it's not just the air to the lungs that can be cut off but the oxygen supply to the brain. Ma maitresse used to do judo and she was telling me about strangle holds, shime-waza, which can cause unconsciousness in a matter of seconds. And serious brain damage if maintained for too long.

I don't read heenglish all that well but I can't see anything in this article which stresses how very dangerous it can be to cut off oxygen supply to the brain, even for a few seconds. I can't see anything which shows people in detail how to avoid putting pressure on a dog's carotid artery, which would do just that. I can't see anything which tells people how long it is suggested that they deprive their dog of oxygen.

And I have to tell you, that in my humble dog opinion, the answer to that is never. Not at all. Ever.

If I bark because I am afraid, choking the air out of me is the last thing I need.

Please, anyone, no matter how desperate you are because of your dog's behaviour, I urge you, do not go down this root. There are lots and lots of nice human beans out there who can show you a different way. Ma maitresse has Grisha Stewart's BAT book, which has helped us both, and likes http://intellidogs.com/ for really simple, practical advice.

I am asking you all please, on behalf of my canine cousins everywhere, just to think hard about this. If your teenage son or daughter was shouting at you aggressively, would you think it acceptable to put them in a chokehold and cut off their air?

And if you answer no, please explain to me why you think it would be acceptable for your dog?

Are you humans really top dog?

It's been a while since I put paw to keyboard. Even though I'm only a dog, sometimes when I hear the things you human beans do to us animals, I am lost for words. So many of you still have the old fashioned idea that all us dogs can't wait to be leader of the pack in your homes, and that's the reason for any and all of our behaviour that doesn't suit you.

I read this very interesting article about someone who had to put right the harm done by people who still believe this so-called dominance theory is correct. http://www.apbc.org.uk/Dog-Whispering-Can-Backfire This Mat Ward sounds like a very nice sensible human bean. I wish there were lots more like him.

Let me tell you a little bit about growling and why us dogs do it. Even though I've been with my human bean for 18 months now, having come from the rescue kennels, we are still learning things about each other, and learning to trust one another. So sometimes I growl at her. And yes, I admit, sometimes I even snap.

But that's not me saying I am top dog in this pack and don't you forget it. On the contrary, that's me saying something really scary is going on around me which I neither understand nor like, and you're pushing me a bit too hard, too fast, to accept it. I'd like you to deal with the scary thing, please, and let me just stay in my corner well away from it. And if you insist I come out and face my phobia, I'll just have to resort to biting you to try to explain how scared I am.

Now my human bean is trainable enough to understand this most of the time and she does her best. But there are still far too many out there who suggest dealing with us frightened dogs by “scruffing” or “pinning” us. Both of these methods seem to involve grabbing us by the neck in a way that hurts and throwing us to the floor. I can't think of anything that would terrify me more, nor make me more likely to bite in self-defence.

Today my human bean clearly had a touch of the sun. She bought a strange machine which made a noise and when she ran it over my coat all my lovely hair finished up on the floor. She said it was to make me feel cooler in the heat. She put my Baskerville muzzle on me, just in case, and explained carefully what she was doing and spoke quietly whenever I growled, so after a while, she got most of it done. If she'd grabbed me and shaken me, I'd have been doubly convinced the machine was dangerous and painful and wouldn't have let her try again. Ever.

There are a lot of “experts” out there who claim to be Dog Whisperers or Dog Listeners. They all seem to share a belief in dominance being at the root of everything dogs do. That means they haven't the slightest working knowledge of the language Canis, which is very complicated. “Grrr” has as many different meanings to dogs as “snow” has to Eskimos. It can mean “I'm going to bite you” or it can mean “I don't want to have to bite you but you're putting me in a situation where I see that as my only option”. Anyone who can't tell the difference is putting themselves and their dog in danger.

Human beans are supposed to be the most intelligent species, yet you persist in wasting time trying to get us to learn your strange language, without taking the trouble to learn even the basics of ours. No wonder dogs have so many problems in your company.

I believe you human beans have to take a theory and a practical test before you're allowed to drive one of your motor cars. What a pity you don't have to do the same before you can have a dog.

If you don't speak Canis, there's no shame in admitting it and getting help from a proper interpreter who does. You only have to look at the APBC website to find one near to you. http://www.apbc.org.uk/ Their people are fluent in Canis, and Equus and Felis, and lots of other animal languages too.

Have you ever had problems in a foreign country when something goes wrong and people are crowded round you all shouting at once in a language you don't understand? Imagine how you would feel if, when you were trying to tell them you simply didn't understand, they suddenly resorted to violence, shaking you by the neck, throwing you to the ground and pinning you there. Then imagine the relief if someone came along who spoke both languages and could explain everything clearly to you and the others.

Sound familiar? Which do you think your dog would prefer?

The rules on capital punishment

At last, I've managed to get my paws on the computer to write my next blog. I'd first like to thank all my human bean friends for your kind comments on my last piece. Your words of wisdom are so helpful to a little toutou trying to understand the ways of humans.

One thing occurred to me from your comments, not only here on my blog but in places like Twitter, too. I've been told that the dog in that Cesar Millan video who appeared to be learning not to attack cats by wearing a shock collar and getting zapped every time it went near the cat would otherwise be put to sleep as a cat killer and my question is simply - why?

Why do human beans have the death penalty for dogs who follow what is after all a pretty basic instinct to chase and eat cats?

Ma maitresse has a cat, a very precious Siamesey type thing that thinks it's royalty and well above mere dogs like me. I don't understand about cats. I'd love to eat it. But ma maitresse says, until we get used to one another, we'll just have to live in different parts of the house. Now perhaps the dog owner in the video didn't have enough room to keep her cat and dog separate. In which case I wonder why she was trying to keep such a big and lively dog at all?

It can't be said that she was afraid her dog would kill other people's cats. She obviously doesn't have the dog under control, if she can't stop it attacking her own cat, so she shouldn't be letting the dog off the lead anywhere it could get at other people's cats - should she? That seems to be the law in most countries I've heard of.

I know I'm lucky because there's plenty of room here for both me and the cat. But if there wasn't and we really couldn't get along, I'd like to think ma maitresse would find a new home for one or other of us (and I hope it would be the cat!) rather than having me killed.

Ma maitresse certainly doesn't give me electric shocks or try to strangle me with a choke chain for going for the cat. She understands it's just that I don't know any better - yet. But I am getting better. I can look at the cat through the glass door and sometimes I can even do it without barking at her now.

Ma maitresse once went to see a man called Roger Mugford, about another dog, not me, and one of his people showed her a clever trick. In fact, it's so clever I didn't realise it was her doing a trick until she explained it to me, for this blog. I'd discovered that if I lunged at the door to try and get the cat, a nasty noise happened which I didn't like so I'd jump back nearer to ma maitresse who then made a big fuss of me and gave me a treat. So I learned the polite way to greet the cat was to go quietly up to the door and wag my tail. I thought the scary noise was coming from the cat if I wasn't polite enough - respect! Turns out all along that ma maitresse has an old Cola can full of pebbles and she shakes it to make the noise. And I never even realised. It's much less harmful to me than the shock collar would be, but it has made me understand the polite way to approach a cat.

Other people have also said that two trainers had tried and failed with that cat-killing dog before Mr Millan came along, so he was its last chance. I'd like to know who those trainers were and what their methods were that weren't successful. Because, as you human beans like to say, there's more than one way to skin a cat. And more than one way to train a dog not to.

The way ma maitresse is using is succeeding with me, but slowly, and it takes a lot of time and patience. So perhaps it wouldn't make very good television.

A shocking way to train a dog

I'm so pleased to see that Wales is to be the first part of the UK to ban the use of electric shock collars for “training” dogs. http://ow.ly/1bmSn Wales hasn't always had a very good track record for canine welfare, since it houses more puppy farms than anywhere else in the UK.

This has happened because a lot of animal welfare groups have been working with the Welsh Assembly to ban what the RSPCA calls “a cruel, outdated and unsuitable method of training dogs.” They say “electric shock collars train dogs through pain and through fear”. Just ask any dog that's ever been subjected to them.

So that makes me wonder, again, about Monsieur César Millan and his methods. I have never seen one of his programmes, but I have seen parts of them on YouTube. In one, he seems to be using a shock collar on a dog which does not like cats, although he doesn't say he's using one.

I was puzzled about that, so I asked Monsieur Millan a question about it, a month ago, via Twitter.

@cesarmillan Did you really use an electric shock collar on this dog monsieur? http://ow.ly/ZNi6 If so can you explain why, s'il vous plait?

I didn't get a reply. I know he's very busy and I'm only a little dog, but I would still like to know the answer to my question. I'm pleased to see that if you put “Cesar Millan electric shock collar” into Google, my question comes up on page one, so it's there for all to see.

And I'd like to ask again. If Wales thinks these shock collars are so bad they have to be completely banned, why does Mr Millan think they are a good thing to use? If he uses them, why doesn't he say so, at the time he's using them. And why doesn't he warn people that their use will shortly be against the law in one part of the UK.

Most importantly, why doesn't he tell people that while it might, just might, be ok for very experienced dog handlers and trainers to use them in exceptional circumstances, with great care, they should definitely not be used by inexperienced dog owners unsupervised at home.

For those of you new to my blog, ma maitresse rescued me from a rehoming centre where I was very frightened, so now I can get a bit aggressive if I feel threatened or I don't understand something. I'm gradually training ma maitresse in the best way to explain things to me, so mostly we get along fine and I now have her trained to give me treats when I do the right thing.

Luckily, she's not keen on Mr Millan and his methods. She doesn't believe in his dominance theories. Nor do I. If ma maitresse wants to be pack leader, that's fine by me. I'm only a little toutou, and a scared one at that. I don't want to be top dog. If I growl a bit sometimes it's because I get worried when I don't understand things. Luckily, she usually gets down to my level and explains things a bit more clearly and gently. If she grabbed me by the throat and threw me onto my back – I think M. Millan calls it an alpha roll – I would be so frightened I would definitely bite her.

I try to read everything I can about new ideas to help us dogs train our human beans, and I read this very interesting article on M. Millan and the principle of parsi...parsley .. keeping it simple. http://networkedblogs.com/Crlt (Please excuse me, my heenglish is not very good). I like this article, it makes a lot of sense to me.

When I growl, I'm trying to tell you something, usually that I'm afraid because I don't understand what you just asked me to do. Because even though human beans are supposed to be intelligent, they sometimes don't realise we simply don't speak heenglish, or French, or any other human language. We speak dog, and body language. Very well. Much better than they do. So sometimes when they bend over trying to be friendly, they're really saying something scary and threatening in dog body language.

Most of us dogs know when we're onto a good thing. We don't want to become “pack leaders” in the human bean world. All that stress- who needs it? Going to work, paying bills, doing the shopping. Merci, mais non.

We're perfectly happy to be your faithful companions, ready with a lick and a wag to cheer you up when you need it, desperately keen to get the rules right in your complicated society. Sometimes we get them wrong. When we do, please just ask yourselves – could I have explained that a little better, and give us a second chance.

Please don't ever, ever, subject us to electric shocks, prong collars and choke chains, because they are never the answer.